On my last day in New York I took my boyfriend to a pole dance class.
He had told me that on the last day I could do whatever I wanted. So naturally, I wanted to take a final pole class at my home studio. The classes at the studio are female only so I felt somewhat bad that he would have to wait for me like a parent waiting for a kid to finish their dance class. Then an idea popped into my head. Why don’t I book a private for the two of us?! This would be the perfect opportunity for him to take a class with me.
I had many reasons for doing so. First, mostly for my selfish reasons, I wanted my teacher to teach him how to spot me on moves I was learning. I thought if he could spot my Fonji I was surely in good hands with my training at home. Second, I thought it would be a fun way to bond and share with him one of my biggest passions in life.
My boyfriend is well aware of all the rigorous training I go through, especially during competition season- I turn into a grumpy pants due to all the physical and mental stress I’m in. I show him all the videos, I show him all the Instagrams of dream moves. He attends pole events with me. He’s even developed a critical eye of a pole dancer when watching competitions…“She didn’t point her feet” he would comment.
For the first half of the private we worked on my moves; having him learn how to spot me properly. And then it was the fun part – his turn! He learned how to invert straddle, shoulder mount and basic climb. I was so happy he was willing and open to have that experience – a keeper for sure!
I wanted to get some insight on his experience so I interviewed him…AKA asking him all these pesky questions before bed.
What was your impression of pole dancing before we met?
I knew it was something that people did for fun and that it was different from stripping. I assumed it was some just spinning around the pole and just dancing around the pole.
How has your view of pole expanded/changed after meeting me?
It’s a much more serious sport than thought. I saw your first competition video and I was not only very impressed but somewhat enamored and in awe of what you could do.
How did you feel before taking the class?
I was pretty nervous that I was going to get hurt – that I would hit my balls. I knew I’d probably be in pain afterwards even without injury, I’ve seen some pretty bad pole kisses and thought that was going to happen. Probably get a cramp in the leg…
What was the most challenging aspect?
The most challenging was putting enough strength to lift your whole body over your head with no real experience.
Did you think it would be that hard?
I knew it was hard, I didn’t know how hard it was to do it for an hour.
Favorite part of class?
Being able to hang upside down.
Would you take a class again?
I would…after I work out a little more before and get shorter shorts.
Doing pole together definitely lets you learn a lot about each other. It’s very interactive, you spot each other. When I spot you I genuinely do feel the grit and the struggle. I want you to get to where you want to get your body. And now that I’ve done it on the pole, I know it’s even that much harder than I thought.
For any pole addict out there, I feel like having your partner/boo/significant other try out your most favorite thing in the world is a must do at least once. They may not get into it as much as you, but it’s a great and fun way to share something so important in your life.
Pole dance is a difficult hobby to maintain. We won’t always be at the top of our game. We can’t always think of new ways to transition into familiar tricks. We don’t always feel strong or sexy or bendy. Sometimes we hit a wall. And when that happens, it’s frustrating.