I’ve been poling for a little over four years now and throughout that time there are many changes I’ve see in myself. My arms are buffer, my splits are (a little) bendier, my flow is smoother, my overall health and happiness is higher. Oh and my pole shorts have gotten shorter.
There’s a theory out there that there is an inverse relationship between the amount of time you’ve been pole dancing and how short your shorts are. Looking at myself and the coverage of my bum, I can’t help but agree.
So here’s a little story about the evolution of my pole shorts told in the second person.
On the first day of class the studio will tell you that shorts are needed. Okay so you bring some shorts. Knowing nothing about the pole world, you find some shorts that you wear for the normal gym or running. You may find some yoga shorts at the mall, but even some of those yoga shorts make you feel a little self conscious – it’s kinda tight and it’s kinda short. But it’s for your pole class and everyone is wearing shorts so the “is this too small???” feeling starts to go away.
You start to take more classes and get hooked on pole. You start to familiarize yourself with the pole celebrities on Instagram and all the pole brands that exist for our little niche community. Maybe you start out conservatively ordering some pole wear from sportier brands. You’ve graduated from regular gym shorts to actual pole shorts! At first you can’t help but to feel a lil naked when your gluteal fold us exposed but after a few minutes you don’t mind anymore. “Look how cute my butt looks with this little ruching down the middle! Plus all this extra skin is giving me extra grip!”
As time progresses, you feel natural in your sports bra and shorts. Eventually you become mesmerized by those sexier brands. Perhaps a few months or years ago you thought that they were nothing but lingerie but now you find yourself in a cute sparkley/strappy/lacey set that may be tinier than the underwear you currently own. But you feel great in them.
I still wear a variety of pole short lengths depending on my mood and whether or not it’s that time of the month. But what I once considered way too tiny could now be just perfect. As long as I got my follicle situation down there sorted out, I’m ready to hop on the pole!
I think the real theory is this: The longer you pole, the more you start loving your body. The more you start loving your body, the shorter your shorts get.
Halloween is just a few short days away, and things aren’t exactly what they seem. Particularly when it comes to my cat. I’ve noticed him staring at my pole. Lounging with my Pleasers. Eyeing my drawer of pole clothes. I shake my head and tell myself it’s not possible. That everything pole related I’ve noticed lately is purely coincidence. That he’s just a cat, and cats don’t pole dance.
Or do they?
But when the photos came, I couldn’t find a single one that I liked. My costume was too big, and I showed. My stomach looked flabby. My hair was a mess. I didn’t hold some tricks nearly as long enough as I had thought, and those I had held weren’t really aimed at the audience. So, I had a good cry, shut my laptop, and decided to look back at them another day.